Every person probably mentions that there are many days of their life which are often similar to one another. Those days create similar weeks that on their side form similar months. Can we change our habits? Here is a more detailed answer.
The Problem and Advantage of Everydayness
Let us come back to our everyday life. We wake up with the same mood every morning. We live each day of ours with the same set of thoughts and actions. Moreover, we want the same stuff day after day. Nothing changes. On one hand, these are good news. When people have similar days, it means that their life is stable and ordered. They know for sure what they should expect from life and what should they do with it. After all, a person does not need to invent any new behavior.
Surprisingly, the routine everyday life is considered to be effective from the energy and power saving perspective. After all, a person does not need to invent any new behavior, idea, does not need to change its worldview or extend it. In short, a person does not need to change. Everything goes automatically without any unnecessary stress.
What About Brain?
Even our brain is arranged this way. Our response to the situation is based on our previous experience. This is time-saving and fast. A person does not need to invent a new reaction each time in every situation. Everything happens rather simply. The situation occurs, then it is compared with a previous experience where the similar case can be found. Once it is found, the person gets a ready answer. That is how a person falls into trap. They just repeat their past like a squirrel in a running wheel. That is how habits, as well as behavioral and mental stereotypes are constructed. That is how a person is deprived of another future.
Stereotypes and Habits
In general, everything a person has in life, including their achievements and losses, is dependent on the stereotypes and habits of a person. When a person suddenly starts to feel that they need something that cannot be blended with the settings of their everyday life, that is the time when problems arise. It is awful and tragic when people understand that they do useless things while having good skills and talents. It is even more dramatic when they understand that they do not know what to do with it.
After a while they come to the idea that they need to learn something anew and with the new approach. A lot of inner changes are yet to be experienced. There is a lot of work to do, a lot of skills and thoughts to change. The person is going to turn from a person with routine life into a person who chooses their future. The choice is crucial here. There is nothing one can do with a habit except of becoming aware of it. The next step is to make a choice whether a person keeps it or finds another way.
It seems that these are easy and evident. However, there are too many people who prefer not to change anything. There can be different reasons for such a behavior. The most crucial one is the lack of instruments. A person does not know how to go beyond the boundaries of their stereotypes.
Fortunately, nowadays there are many psychologists with their views on this problem. They provide others with a set of steps that will lead a person to a better conscious life. Psychologists claim that the first step is to answer certain questions:
“What Does Not Suit Me?”
It is the basic question for a person who wants to change. The set of answers may differ. Some people say that features like an arguing habit or a tendency to underestimate oneself are bad. Sometimes a person thinks that they are awesome and the main cause of all the misfortunes is the phenomenon of “others”. They claim that those are other people who spoil their life. That is the case when they need to ask themselves another question.
“How Is It Connected to Me?”
For example, a woman thinks that she is awesome and all men are not good enough for her. However, she should think about the reason why all men seem to be a mismatch for her. There are a lot of similar questions, such as “What do I do so that nobody appreciates me (screams at me, feels dissatisfied with me…)?”.
The next question is about future. A person should ask themselves how they want things to be different. The description of the future has to be positive, not negative. A person should describe what they want to be present in their lives. For example, it is preferable to think about a neutral attitude to cigarettes instead of having a smoking habit or about feeling joy for another person instead of any kind of envy.
A person should try to create an integrated image of their new behavior and feelings with all of the accompanying nuances. They have to imagine not only the things they make differently, but also their feelings about it. They should also think of the changes in situations, of the appearance of new people in their life. This is the method of creating and forming a new habit. That is why a person needs to be open for experiments and create any desirable details of their future. After all, it is their own image.
Each habit is impressed on our brain by means of strong emotions or frequent repeating. That is why a person should fill their self-image with positive emotions and impressions. That is how the emotional component will be added. The next thing to mention is that the image should not be forgotten right after its occurrence. The process of self-transformation needs time, that is why the one who wants to transform needs to find time for it.
Psychologists recommend people to do a certain training every evening in order to change their habits. A person needs only ten minutes before going to bed to form a good habit. During that time, a person should close their eyes and try to live in their imaginary idea of a new life. After a while everything starts to change easily and naturally without even being noticed.
Nevertheless, it is worth mentioning that a human being is not a robot. There is no possibility to program everything one can think of. The key to the positive result is that the image which a person invents for themselves will reflect their values and priorities. Thus, any habits can be changed, but it is all in our own hands.